Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Monday, October 6, 2008
Friday, October 3, 2008
Howard understands your life is probably tough right now, given the current state of the economy. And you know what he thinks you should do? Drink. Drink your sorrows away. Drink your life away. Just drink. Have some more Jack Daniels and Coke. It isn't going to hurt your. Drink, drink, drink, until you cannot find your way out from under the table. Drink until your head spins and hurts so bad that vomiting up blood seems minor. Drink!
Tell 5 people to drink, and then they'll tell 5 people to drink, and then those 5 people will tell five people, and then 5 more people will tell 5 more people, and 5 more people will start drinking and soon another 5 people will generate another 5 people, and they will have had so much to drink they will be looking at 1 person and seeing 5 people! Hey this could work!
Drink so much that politicians finally start making sense to you.
*Howard does not actually want you to drink. He is a teetotaler in real life, but he doesn't mind mocking Hollywood narcissists who make stupid commercials like this one.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
What is the government going to do to bail out Halloween for the poor children of America? They will not experience the Halloween of our youths! Why we used to worry about small things, like razor blades in candy apples from the crazy little old lady down the road, or poison injected into our beloved snickers bars by the family whose kids smelled like pee! Or worse yet, the dentist who handed out toothbrushes! It is a crying shame that our children will not have this right of passage. Barrack Obama? John McCain? What are your views on this shameful crisis? For the love of God, what are you going to do for the CHILDREN??? There are no houses to trick or treat at!